You don't have to suffer

Picking up new habits is very easy: getting into the habit of doing something, even if it’s a bad thing, seems so quick and easy. However, breaking these habits is a much more challenging task. One of the reasons for this is that we don’t even realize it’s a become a habit. We all have these annoying little things we’ve picked up along the way and being aware of them is the first step towards change. Constant complaining is one of the most common of them all but with a bit of extra work, we can definitely beat it.

The first thing you can do is try catching yourself in the act. Once you are aware of the fact that you’re about to complain, it’ll be easier to stop yourself from going down that road.

1 Change your perspective

When you feel like you’re about to start complaining, try focusing all that you’re grateful for. Life is full of blessings and we need to see that. You can combat all those dark feelings by shifting focus away from what is disappointing you to what brings you joy. Training your mind to do that takes practice but it’s totally doable. Changing your perspective is the first step you can take towards a more positive, happier life. By learning to appreciate the little things in life, you’re conditioning your mind to see them first and not focus on negative things.

2 Smash negative thinking by focusing on what’s positive

Once you’ve started to train yourself to shift focus, the next step is to stay focused. You don’t have to be positive all the time – denying that there are negative experiences n life will not help you avoid feeling negative and it is just as unhealthy as being negative. Accept the fact that you will face disappointment but do not let the negative things take your eyes off of all that is good in your life. Simply make a decision to stay focused on the positive things. Others will also appreciate your efforts for we all prefer spending time with a person who can always see the bright side of life. So don’t try to deny the negative things but don’t wallow in them either. The best is yet to come.

3 What goes around comes around

As you sow, so shall you reap. You are responsible for making wise decisions and treating others in a nice way. You always reap what you sow. If you complain all the time, if you feel down all the time and if you like to wallow in those negative feelings, that’s what you’ll get in life. It’s like a vicious circle. Focusing on the negative things will result in seeing the negative but things only and that leads to more disappointment and constant complaining. Real change happens on the inside first but life will catch up eventually. So do not allow yourself to wallow, hope for the better until things actually change for the better.

So what happens when you decide to look on the bright side of life?

I used to be one of those people who love to wallow. It’s weird to say it now but I used to love feeling sorry for myself, I used to love the drama of it all. Suffering was my muse in life and it seemed like a lot of people could identify with my pain and hopeless love life. As an artist, your work seems to find its audience when you write about pain. But then I realized if I’m consumed by pain and suffering, my life will be all about pain and suffering so I gradually started focusing on the positive things in life. As I was teaching my mind to look on the bright side, leaving those sufferings behind became easier and easier until I could finally beat it. Whenever I’m facing hardships now, I don’t wallow in those negative feelings. I acknowledge the negative things in life but that’s all. I’d rather focus on what I can learn from any given situation. I don’t think it requires any special skills, if I can do it, anybody can do it. It’s not something you’re born with but you can definitely learn to do it.

When you start letting all those positive energies in and focusing on the things that bring you joy, you’ll soon realize that more and more of those things will find you and you don’t have to work on being genuinely happy about them anymore. You’ll be much more energized, much more open to the world and you’ll find who you really are. You’ll feel lighter than ever. I’d never want things to go back to the way they were before.

I know now that whenever life gives you lemons, it’s your choice to make that lemonade. You have the power to change your attitude. So if the choice is yours, make it.

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