Guy talk: Is love enough for a relationship?

We don’t often come across real love in life but when we do find a person we truly love, we immediately want to give it our all.

Though we tend to get mixed up in our feelings, loving someone and being in love with somebody are not the same thing. Being in love will not be enough to keep your relationship strong, loving your partner will. The feeling of being in love will eventually fade away and if there’s nothing else there, your relationship will be over before you know it.

People say that opposites attract. Well, that is a perfect example of how awful things can get once the feelings are gone: when you’re madly in love, you rarely care about all those differences that much but when things get a little more real, those differences get a lot more problematic. In my opinion, a long term relationship needs to start with that all consuming, passionate love but it must turn into a deep, deep love and appreciation for the person who is slowly becoming your other half. Do not fool yourself into believing that the i-am-so-madly-in-love phase will last forever with anyone - chasing that feeling forever won’t get you anywhere.

A happy and healthy long term relationship takes realizing that and seeing things clearly. Being in love will not necessarily make you happy and it will surely leave you disappointed in the long run. You won’t last long trying to hold on to a person you’re in love with but can’t cope with: you might be able to tame them a bit but you can never really change somebody else’s character or behavior.

Your happiness lies in your ability to see past the feelings and to think about your future. I know that finding someone you’re crazy about doesn’t happen that often but to stake your all upon the idea of being in love might leave you empty-handed. Give yourself time to get to know the other person better and to really see them for who they are. It takes time to learn and to grow together but accepting each other’s flaws and imperfections is the foundation of a strong relationship.

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